Monday, March 14, 2011

The Lockout

I'm NOT locked out of the Basement, man. But OH MY F***ING GOD it's cold down here. Nobody's been in here for weeks. And, it's 1:37 in the morning, and I've got the kind of head cold where your ear inflates with gas and it hurts like being an overinflated football that's getting being used for punting practice. I can't lie down, so I might as well state the obvious:

The Lockout is a BOON to all Doormat teams that were afraid change was going to screw up their chemistry. Here's a perfect example: The 49ers were talking real sweet with Alex Smith, because, guess what? In a lockout, they can't GET anybody else. It's a very very very...VERY strong possibility the 49ers will start their season, whenever it may have the unfortunate occasion to start, with Alex Smith still under center. Jim Harbaugh has gone from a school that's been getting recruiting gems for 3 solid years, and now he's going to get nothing. NOTHING.

The 49ers are not alone. The Doormat Champion Carolina Pansies are in the same boat, and every other team as well. It's going to be a looooooooooooong spring and summer, drawing up plays for the same bunch of bums on the old roster.

you know, I'm really freezing my balls off in here. Somebody took the heater. I'm going to try to sleep again, football head or not. But, here it is, March, and I give the Pansies and Lions and every cellar-dwelling poor excuse for a gridiron contest that can cough up a ball at the 1 yard line and let it go 99 the other way a HUGE advantage over any pretenders to the Moldy Carpet.

good night!!