Sunday, January 9, 2011

Losing on the Cheaps

Edgar Allan Poes 30, Cheaps 7

The Doormat Division is 2-0 in predictions in the playoffs so far, with the Kansas City Cheaps turning in the kind of Doormat performance they were so fond of last year. The biggest pretenders in the playoffs (bigger than the SeaHags, in our opinion), the Cheaps can't even get 162 yards of offense against, admittedly, a stonewall of a defense. Or maybe that was just the frozen tundra they kept running into. Ouch! To the jacuzzi!

Listen up folks- any team that can turn in a 5 first down game in Week XIV, and get humiliated by their arch enemy the Raiders in the season finale- at home- is more than likely going to go for an encore in the playoffs (just like the Bungles did last year). This is almost a Doormat Axiom.

And they did an encore for the ages. 8 first downs! 1 TD, all done with one run. 1-8 on 3rd down. Quarterback rating of 20.4- a SEASON LOW for any quarterback in any game all year long, people. Wow! And the possession time of 18:06 is also the SEASON LOW. They only got off 40 plays , turned it over FIVE times, and made complete fools of themselves for the whole frozen turf of an afternoon at Arrow-thru-the-head Stadium. By the way, can any NFL quarterback look more unfazed and like he's got all the time in the world more than Joe Flacco? I haven't seen that kind of non-chalance since Joe Montana.

Cheaps fans must be wondering if the whole season was a mirage. Here's the skinny: IT WAS A MIRAGE, folks.

Seeya in the Doormat, next year, KC. You can have the Barcalounger.

3 comments:

  1. sea-hags will be moving up next year. All their rookies will be one year older and they have a heckuva coach as long as they under dogs. Cheaps will be in basement, you're right. also going 49ers again. Harbaugh can't help them til York goes.

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  2. As much I like to hate Pete Carroll, his team is still alive in the playoffs. Harbaugh will help the 49ers, but he won't have Andrew Luck with him. The York family...oh my. What a mess.

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  3. Are the Yorks related to Georgia Frontiere by any chance? See you all at the bottom of the cellar. The NFC Worst is not done yet. Next year's winner will be 6 and 10.

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