TAKE A KNEE SUNDAY!
If having the whole league take a knee or stand arm in arm will produce results like yesterday's games, I suggest they do this every Sunday. Joking aside, it was a fantastic display of unity.
And upsets all over the place, which was fitting. The underdogs rose up knocked off a few big dogs!!! We're still recovering from the celebrations here in the Basement.
DOORMAT DIVISION WEEK 3 STANDINGS
NFC
W-L PF PA DIF
NY GIANTS 0-3 37 70 -33
SANTA CLARA 0-3 51 76 -25
CHICAGO 1-2 47 69 -22
NEW ORLEANS 1-2 73 78 -5
SEATTLE 1-2 48 59 -11
AFC
W-L PF PA DIF
CINCINNATI 0-3 33 60 -27
CLEVELAND 0-3 56 76 -20
COLTS 1-2 53 90 -37
NY JETS 1-2 52 72 -20
HOUSTON 1-2 53 74 -21
GAME OF THE WEEK
BROWNS 28, COLTS 31
Believe it or don't, this qualifies as an upset, because the Browns were favored, by .0075 points. But being favored didn't faze the Blank Helmets- they came out and had the Colts looking like Super Bowl contenders in the first half, getting run over for 286 yards and 28 points. It takes some serious coaching to amass 4 offensive pass interference penalties, drop 7 passes, and throw three INTs, but the Brownies did it. How they squeezed in some completions, we'll never know.
Despite all this, the Brownouts dang near won the game, going 4-5 in the red zone, and it wasn't until the final INT with 0:00 on the clock that the L was safely in the Brownie coffers. 1-18 in the Hugh Jackson Era. Q: Will the Colts win another game? Or was that it?
BLOWOUT OF THE WEEK
JAGS 44, RAVENS 7
London: The Jags have played so many games in London, it's a home game now. They've been so bad in London, it was a yearly Doormat showcase. But THIS TIME, they got up off the mat and clocked a team teetering on the edge of the Basement Abyss. For once, the Jaguars played for the entire game. For once- they WON.
Joe Flacco started for the Original Browns, gets sacked twice, throws two INTs and finishes with a QB rating of 0.5, which I didn't know was possible. 186 total yards for the Cravens, and 1.8 yards per pass. Jags pile up 410 yards, score six TDs, pull off a 58 yard gain on a fake punt, and are 2-1 for the first time since...I don't remember this. Quoth the Jaguar: Mmfph..momp...mmm, raven.
NEXT: at Jets. Jags never win two in a row. The long trip to London...the JET lag. Gonna be interesting.
THE REST OF THE UPSET PILE
RAIDERS 10, WASHINGTON 27
You're supposed to get UP after the national anthem plays. Punter Marquette King only player to show up, averaging 52 yards on 7 punts. Raiders unveil "Least Mode." Ah, the good old days.
GIANTS 24, EAGLES 27
It was 14-0 Eagles at the end of the 3rd quarter. And then the Gnats staged a wild comeback, getting ahead 21-14, and yet managed to blow the lead and still lose, sliding in with their winless record intact (0-3). Was it a Futile Comeback? Blown Lead? Giants still can't run the ball, so no matter what Eli Manning does, this team is gonna pile up the L's like stacking cord wood outside the cabin.
BILLS 26, BRONCOS 16
It's fun to only get 16 first downs, and still win. It's an upset, but the Broncos can tank pretty good. Bills QB Tyrod Taylor ignores his 'make these mistakes' menu. Keep that up, and the Bills climb outta the Basement. The Broncos brought their own losing menu: A bonnnnnehead fake punt, at their own 25 yard line, total fail (Bills convert a FG); two really bad bad-decision interceptions; and most odd, a 3rd down taunting penalty on Vaughn Miller (4th quarter, game on line) for...pretending to help Taylor up, and pulling his hand away. They had been goofing on each other all game, and both were laughing when the ref threw his hanky, but Taylor got to keep laughing. It gave the Bills a first down, they ate up 4 minutes on the clock and kicked a field goal to BOOT. Broncos don't recover. Miller won't pull that again, but bonehead plays are catching, you know. Next man up, Broncos!
BEARS 23, STEELERS 17 (OT)
ANOTHER upset!!! This one really counts. Nobody picked the daBares to pull this one off. Steelers looking shaky, could be teetering on mediocrity, as they give the Bears, who have no passing game, 220 rushing yards. Bears appear to have a defense. Appearances can be deceiving.
JETS 20, DOLPHINS 6
Well, at least we CALLED this one before the season even started. The trap game for the Jets. The Floppers didn't score until there was zero time left on the clock. And they missed the extra point. Honorable mention: The Flops called a fake punt, with Flops punter Matt Haack (he really should get that cough looked at) throws a BOMB, which gets intercepted and run back all the way to the Fins 49. At least the teams combined for 12 punts, so we almost felt at home. If the Nyets really want to be the worst team in the NFL and get that 1st round pick, they might need to bench Josh McCown, or find him a concussion or something. He was playing well against the Raiders last week, and played solid yesterday. Not putting in the mediocre play expected of him.
So far, only ONE Doormat team LOST on Sunday, the Giants. We can't count the Colts and Browns, because somebody had to win (OK tie is possible, ok OK).
RETURN TO NORMALCY
CHARGERS 10, CHIEFS 24
Finally, somebody just flat took care of business. The Chagrins didn't even bother with taking a lead in this one. Charred QB Philip "Why Is the Other Team in the Way?" Rivers chips in 3 ints.
I wonder if the team owners will ever notice that the vast majority of fans buy the light blue jerseys. Couldn't they at least give the fans ONE thing, suiting up in the light blue, since victories are not on the menu? The band-box stadium is kinda nifty, though.
TEXANS 33, PATRIOTS 36
Never count out the Houston Texans when a game is there for the losing. Despite being handed 417 yards of total offense, the Texan offense put a cork in the touchdown magnum in the 4th quarter and their defense slid the winning touchdown into the Patriot huddle with :23 seconds left in the game. Snatching defeat from the jaws of victory never felt so..so..well done.
Patriots love to give away yardage, it's like visiting some huge cattle ranch when you play them. Open spaces as far as the eye can see, but there are these sudden stampedes here and there. Don't fence me in, baby. Texans aren't doormats yet, but boy are they working on it.
SEAHAGS 27, TITANS 33
It's hard to take a Doormat contender seriously when they pile up 433 yards of total offense, and score 27 points. Yet, they got in 8 punts, timed 11 penalties masterfully, and their defensive line was Marshmallow City. No sacks. Colts come to town next week. If they can lose to the Clots, they're in business. Maybe old Rah-Rah Pete's act is causing deafness on the Puget Sound.
BUNGLES 24, PACKERS 27 (OT)
Bungles find another way to lose. Beautifully crafted come-from-ahead loss. 0-3 and a trip to Cleveland next Sunday. OH MY. Look out. Everybody duck!
TONIGHT:
COWBOYS AT CARDINALS
Maybe the Crudinals can clear up a lot of questions in the NFC West. Right now, you can pretty much hand the Division to the Rams, and how nuts is that. Hard to be quality Doormat when your entire division is knocking on the slobber-covered sliding glass door on the patio.
WEEK THREE WORST STATS
OFFENSE:
Points: 6 DOLPHINS
First downs: 7 RAIDERS (first sub-10 of the year!)
Total Yards: 128 RAIDERS (first sub-150 of the year!)
Passing: 52 RAVENS
Rushing: 32 RAIDERS
QB Rating: 0.5 Flacco, Ravens
3rd down conv: 0-11 RAIDERS
4th down conv: 0-3 DOLPHINS
Red Zone conv: 0-3 TITANS
Turnovers: 3 CLE,BAL, ATL, TB, OAK, LAC,
INT: 3 CLE, ATL, LAC,BUCS
Fumbles lost: 2 STEELERS
Sacked: 6/33 PACKERS
Fumble six given: 1 Patriots
Pick-six given: 1 Packers, Falcons
Blocked kick run back for TD: 1 Bears
DEFENSE:
Total Yards allowed: 494 BUCS
Pass yards allowed: 369 BUCS
Rush yards allowed: 220 STEELERS
No sacks: 0 Seahawks, Bucs, Eagles
Punts: 8 SEAHAWKS
Penalties: 10/137 Giants
Penalties 13/122 CHIEFS
Time of Poss: 21:54 RAIDERS
aaaAAAAnd That's the View From the Basement!!!
OMG The "LEAST MODE” I LOVE IT !!!
ReplyDeleteIf having the owner come out and lock arms with the players results in doormats becoming champions then we might start to see this a little more. Farid Khan and Dan Snyder both went on the field with their players and locked arms during the kneeling ceremony and Kablam!! Gags become Jaguars and Deadskins come alive and become...
well maybe "least mode" helped out to a greater degree, but remember the Raiders are only one season removed from doormat glory so perhaps the regression is so easy for them we could see it more frequently....
then the Bungling Bungles, who snatched that loss right from the jaws of the mighty Cheeseheads I think they could challenge the Blank helmets for the inferiority crown. Next week thats the game to watch...
although this week the game to watch was the steel curtain devolving into the shower curtain, da bears rushing for
220 yards reminds of the good old days when games were won or lost on the ground...
where Tyrod Taylor was laying and Von Miller doing the famous “Here, let me help you up- NOT” and getting a taunting penalty!! I think the refs were over stepping their roles of subjectively choosing which team to help get a win...
sheesh It really is the No Fun League!
Yeah, really interesting outcomes of games after all the ceremony. It can't just be coincidence.
Delete"I have to take credit for the Least Mode remark made last night in a text...Will it be proven that putting stress on one's knee just prior to a game, might have negative effects out your playing ability? How come nobody took issue with Marshawn when he was sitting and eating a Banana before game 1, obviously taking a dig at Soccer (Futbol)? Kirk Cousins just might be the real deal, and the Raiders seem to have trouble beating a team coached by a Gruden...
Deletethe curse of chuckie lives on?
Deletethen quoth mr King “holy toledo!”
as you noted elsewhere, DT, quarterbacks get a much high level of scrutiny in the NFL. Marshawn sat down for the anthem for the last two years he was in Seattle, I think, and nobody ever said anything about it. But, it has exited being about Kaepernick now, anyway. It's a larger issue, which I think is healthy.
DeleteIt was the Banana thing I was referring to, as they are thrown at black soccer players in European leagues from time to time. Imagine if that happened here! I'm sure Lynch knew exactly what he was doing, but like with "Rocketman" the MSM missed it, or chooses to only report what they want or want to to you to believe. Frankly I'm getting tired of all the taunting, end zone dancing, etc...I miss good sportsmanship and celebrating "after the game and only if you won" as Gale sayers so eloquently said on MNF several years ago. It would be cool if some team decided to go that route, ignore all taunts, no cheap hits or trash talk. Run thru the End Zone and lay the ball down or hand it to the closet ref after a TD and get back your sideline and get ready for the next series of downs. It is just as nauseating in baseball when sone guy gets an RBI when walked with the bases loaded and gets to first base points to the sky...Way too much sideline BS during the game, and we don't need it before the game as well. So I vote to do away with the Anthem, and the NFL should return the money they have or donate it to flood and hurricane cities...
Deletenice call there. do away with the anthem, donate the money or give it back.
DeleteAlso seems weird to think that there is racism in other parts of the world, I feel like USA is king of that topic, but throwing bananas at a player would def. get you ejected from the stadium here. The NHL has a huge problem with the early black players (only last decade)
My travels to Europe and Asia indicate plenty of racism to go around, and the USA is better at exposing it than most. We have at least a conversation about it, and almost all other countries have nowhere near the diversity that we have. Funny that some of the NFL players knelt last week in London during our National Anthem, but stood for the UK's. I guess most of them don't know that England backed the Confederacy during the Civil War, right up until Appomattox. So much confusion, and like Sanctuary Cities thumbing their nose at Federal Law, the NFL will not enforce their own code. So I blame the League again.
DeleteThat man said a BAD WORD, Mr. Referee-man
ReplyDeleteThat Flacco stat--had to look at it three times to believe it. Is that really possible? A lot of teams aren't passing the sniff test this year. Could be one of the best years for crazy bad play in a long time.
ReplyDeleteESPN stat on Flacco. That's the LOWEST I've ever seen for a starting QB. EVER.
Deletehttps://scontent.fsnc1-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.0-9/21765293_10155686260867641_1163662692670485356_n.jpg?oh=5aeb99c23ee9f3e907f569e71a531935&oe=5A502C59
ReplyDeleteThat's correct.
DeleteThe national anthem was played, but the players were back in the locker room, taping up.
DeleteTrump putting his foot in his mouth (imagine that) might be a good thing in the long run. But fans should be respected as well.
ReplyDeleteWe saw Lynch every week up here in Portland as we are force fed the SeaHags. I find his antics amusing, and not really much of a protest.
Also, we had groups of students that always sat at Grant HS football and basketball games in 1971...so for me, it is all a big yawn. If part of your job description is to salute for two minutes before each game, you should just do it. It is really that simple. And if you're the POTUS, you should think before popping off...or you come off as a simpleton.
Well, from my personal perspective, I'd love it if I didn't hear that tune so often. But that's just the musician talking. But really, we just wear that thing out.
DeleteThey've made it cheap and tawdry. They should stop with the patriotic fanfare. I do, however, love it at The Olympics because it's an international competition. Maybe, do God Bless America...maybe...and do The National Anthem only at The Super Bowl. They really should compose an anthem extolling the virtues of corporate sponsorship because what we actually have are The Fed Ex Titans, The Microsoft Seahawks, The For Lions, etc.
ReplyDeleteAh I yearn for the good old days and The Gamblin' Eddy 49ers!!
Delete