NFL Predictions Week XII: Which Turkeys are Done?

Every team has played at least ten games, and 9 of them have 3 or fewer wins. If any 3-7 team runs the table they could conceivably make the playoffs as a 9-7 wild card, but come on, are Cleveland, Buffalo, NYG, Tampa Bay, Jacksonville or NYJ going to win 6  in a row? On the other hand, any one of these teams could easily lose 6 in a row, which means they all have a shot at the Moldy Carpet. This year, it’s going to be exciting right to the end.

And speaking of the end, Oakland missed the chance to be done for the season with a last minute field goal against Arizona. They could have been 1-9 and almost a lock for the AFC basement. They have now won two games. Their dominance of the basement is in question.

Which brings up a question: Which turkey is closest to being “done” and poised to snag the Moldy Carpet? Fittingly, with Thanksgiving upon us, we turn to the Turkey Quotient for some clues to the future. Here are the current teams with negative TQs:

AFC

OAK: -12.3

MIA: -10.1

NYJ: -10.1

BUF: -7.1

JAC: -2.3

TEN: -1.1

(Wow, Brownies are in positive territory right now (+0.2))

NFC

ARI: -9.1

SAN: -6.6

DET: -5.1

NYG: -4.8

TAM: -2

PHI: -2

ATL: -0.5

(Don’t forget Alex Smith is out for the season, Washington could lose 6 in a row.)

Clearly, Oakland and the New York Jets are around 155 degrees and getting nice and brown on top. Time to bast them! A few more losses and the little red button should pop out. I predict the Raiders pop first. Miami has a strong negative TQ, but 5 wins. Not sure how that happened. They will tank, but with 5 Ws, it’s too late for them. As for the NFC, it looks like Arizona and San Francisco are the only two getting close to done. SF has to play Seattle twice, Rams once and the Bears before it’s all over. No way they win more than two more games. Arizona gets the Rams and Seahawks, but the rest of their schedule is a little soft. I give the 49ers the first red button pop up!

The rest of the Turkeys? Detroit, Buffalo, and the Giants all have a shot, but not likely. This Moldy Carpet is going to come down to a Turkey Shoot with Oakland or NYJ in the AFC and San Francisco or Arizona in the NFC.

But it’s Turkey week now, so here are the predictions:

Chicago- 28

Detroit-16

San Francisco- 14

Tampa Bay- 28

New England- 36

New York Jets- 12

New York Giants- 16

Philadelphia- 12

(The collapse will be total, but too late for the Moldy Carpet)

Oakland- 17

Baltimore-21

Jacksonville- 21

Buffalo-17

Cleveland- 28

Cincinnati- 30

Arizona- 10

Los Angeles Chargers- 36

Miami- 21

Indianapolis-33

Enjoy your turkeys, gentlemen!

The Oracle has spoken!