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Ah yes, a preseason battle in the trenches at Kesar stadium on a gorgeous foggy 63 degree day in August 1953. Hardly any pads, useless face guards, tackling mostly below the waist cause you can't just smash the guy with your head, and tossing maybe 20 passes for 125 yrds in the air. Mostly the wishbone in action, 15 teeth knocked out, everybody has a gash on his leg somewhere, four pounds of grass injested, and three broken fingers. Now that was football.
This weekend the Browns and Niners square off in a game that will definitely not look like football. Johnny Foosball gets the nod from Cleveland and Blaine Gabbert--who has played surprisingly well--will be under center for the Niners. Both of these teams have finished multiple games this season with bizarre plays and epic meltdowns. Browns might be on the way to the Moldy Carpet, but the Niners will pose a difficult challenge. It will be very hard to lose to these guys. Also, this may be a preview of the Doormat Bowl. This should be the game of the week!
And here are the Oracle's predictions:
Bills: 17
Eagles: 13
Seahawks: 38
Ravens: 3
49ers: 18
Browns: 17
Lions: 24
Rams: 10
Titans: 21
Jets: 17
Colts: 10
Jaguars: 14
Chargers: 9
Chiefs: 18
(9 field goals in this game)
Redskins: 21
Bears: 17
Saints: 42
Buccaneers: 38
Raiders: 24
Broncos: 17
Cowboys: 10
Packers: 33
Giants: 24
Dolphins: 28
Gentlemen, make your predictions!
Lions - Rams is also a doozy. Browns game is return to Cleveland of longtime Brown kicker Phil Dawson, who now kicks for SF. Believe it or don't, you will see no shortage of Dawson jerseys in the stands. He was a beacon of excellence in a parade of excresence. Ok that's not a word. Johnny Foosball is the wild card in this one. If Niners can contain him, he will stink- Niner D is actually playing a bit better. As with everything this season with nearly every team except Carolina (and even them) the first 3 quarters mean almost nothing, and all the implosion and improbables surface in a wild 4th quarter.
ReplyDeleteEDGE TO LOSE: BROWNS
Lions-RAms: Rams are just plain terrible. Lions win in a walk.
TITANS - JETS: Jets should cover the spread, even, in this one, but who the hell knows. What an impossible season to predict, Doormat or Floormat or Laundromat. EDGE to LOSE: JETS
COLTS= JAGS: Don't know if Hasselbeck is playing, so no line in Vegas. If no Hasselbeck, Jags kill absorb the win.
Chargers- Chiefs: The AFL West? Completely unpredictable. EVery single stupid game. I declare Chiefs just bury them in the first half, then hold on for wild finish, with Rivers throwing late pick-six to seal it.
SKINS- BEARS: this is definitely who can out-bad the other. I'm saying 'Skins.
more later!
as for door mat games (besides the obvious match advertised our headline) I say watch out for redskins and Da Bares. both teams have been spotty with moments of competence thus far but overwhelmingly are still doormat denizens. Watch for the usual punts and fumbles and awful 3rd down conversion ratios, but in the end it will be who gives the win to the other team. I wish it were on tv in the bay area.
ReplyDeletethe 0-9ers versus Browns in the dawg house is not a game that anyone wants to talk about. while listening to the Damon Bruce show on the 95.7 the game yesterday they actually admitted to being “contractually obligated to talk about the atrocious matchup”. of course we adore such match ups so why not talk about it more! Gabbert looks like the savior for all that troubles SF (sic, Santa Clara), but during 4th quarter, Browns strip search, err sack him and absorb some points to come too close for comfort and have to creatively lose- in a way we have not seen yet this year if you can believe that!
I wish my TV could turn on using a timer, because after all the cans of micro brew tonite I’m not sure how I can get up at 10a....
and the players are "contractually obligated" to play it!!!
Deletedude, you need an old-fashioned VCR with a timer. I still use one. I'm...maybe...it would be so un-Basement...about to pay for the DVR feature. I need a way to let the better half watch her TV shows and then be able to watch sports events in record time.
DeleteI love how old NFL promo ads always a pic of a punter in high leg kick. How come they never use those anymore? was a punter more important then? I don’t think so... was a punter more glamorous then? doubtful,... was a punt more frequent? Hope not, because we got a lot of punts now, and they always seem so demoralizing....I got it, maybe a punter was cool because he had loose hamstrings!
ReplyDeletethey did used to 'drop-kick' on third down, and even do drop kick field goals. Paul Horning was the last player I ever saw do spontaneous third down drop kicks. I saw him do it on a roll-out, even.
Deletehall of famer paul horning doing a drop kick punt, nobody no more. I saw Flutie do a drop kick for a field goal in his last season playing for the pats (he was Brady’s back up for a season.) But for some type of record they let him drop kick a field goal from about 20 yards out. Can’t remember exactly what the record was.....
ReplyDelete