NFL WEEK 10 WORST STATS and Midseason Report

NFL WEEK 10 WORST STATS.   MOST INTERCEPTIONS.  BIGGEST FALL FROM LAST YEAR.  2 YARDS RUSHING.   ALL THE NUMBERS YOU WANT TO CRUNCH LIKE A BAG OF POTATO CHIPS YOU DIDN'T SEE WHEN YOU SAT DOWN ON THE COUCH.


BIGGEST FALL FROM MAGNIFICIENCE:

It's a tie!

HOUSTON TEXANS:  8-1 to 2-7.    Last year at this time, the Toxins were 8-1 and would get to 11-1, before beginning a fade (losing 3 of their last 4) that resulted in an embarrassing 41-28 loss to the Pats in the Divisional playoff (they did win the Wildcard game against the Bengals).  They haven't recovered.  This Doormat slide did not surprise us, though the steep angle did.

ATLANTA FALCONS:   8-1 to 2-7.   The Failcons were in the NFC Championship game last year, just narrowly losing to the 49ers, 28-24.  The fan base expected another great year!  In the preseason, we sounded the warning bells, as their defense was giving up huge piles of points.  That may seem unimportant, but in the preseason you don't want any of your defensive units giving up huge numbers.  It's not like the offense, that is tinkering around.  It hasn't changed in the season, except the offense never did stop dinking around,  and the Atlanta Edsels (get the Falcons-Ford-Edsel thing? No?) find themselves only 1 game out of first in the Doormat NFC.  

Both of these teams are ready and willing to win the Moldy Carpet this year.

BIGGEST RIDICULOUS TURNAROUND

KANSAS CITY CHIEFS:  1-8 to 9-0.  ADIOS BRO-CHA-CHOS!!!   Last year the Cheaps were the worst team in the league (2-14), and narrowly took the Moldy Carpet from the Eagles.  Their solution?  Hire the coach of the worst team in the NFC,  sign Mr. Boring-but-No-Turnovers Alex Smith to QB, and take most of the team out to the dumpster.   Now, they've still got one of the worst offenses in the league, but holy cow that defense is so good, it scores most of the points.  

They've been toying with losing the last few weeks, teetering ever so close to the abyss.  They haven't beat a team with a winning record, but there AREN'T any teams with a winning record this year.  Most of their opponents are solid Doormat members, though.

Still, they haven't lost yet.  Ah,  they're playing Denver this Sunday. Peyton Manning is hobbling around on his gimpy right ankle.   The Chiefs lead the league in sacks.  Look out.    But you know what?  If Alex Smith can't find an open receiver farther downfield than 2.7 yards, they're toast.  

NFC WEAKEAST

In the glory days of 2010, the NFC Worst finished up the season with Seattle on top with a glaring 7-9 record.  It was Doormat Gold, and a first for a complete season.  An entire division with a losing record.  Even after winning a playoff game, the Seahags finished the season 8-10.   Well, GUESS WHAT?   the NFC East is led by the Cowpokes and Eagles at 5-5.   The Eagles look like the most dangerous threat to the East finishing with a losing record.  Lotta ball to play yet, though, so keep an eye on it.


MOST EMBARRASSING FRANCHISE:

MIAMI DOLPHINS.  You don't have to leave Florida to find the worst organization in the NFL.  It's just a matter of taste as to which one.  Jacksonville,  Tampa Bay and Miami have it wired down there in the swamp of bumbling numbskulls of Everglaring Swamp stink.   Hazy on the hazing, you could say.

Jacksonville- yes, simple, plain, organized bad.  But boring.  Except for the London fling, they just don't get the losing with flair thing.
Tampa Bay-  they've actually nearly won 6 games, but have the Come-From-Ahead technique mastered.  They lose with panache.  They were in the lead, but....

The Dolphins.  WOW.  The Floppers  have completely imploded with a bullying 'scandal' that took an already iffy team and plunged them into a kind of ineptitude and country-wide mockery that was on display for the whole country on MNF this past Monday.  What a glorious show that was, right?  These guys, with a 4-5 record, somehow manage to look like the worst team in the league, and prove it by losing to the only team left that hadn't won a game.   HATS OFF IN THE DOORMAT TO THE FLOPPERS.

Boy, that O-line could really use a couple tough guys, though.  Guys that can just bully the-  oh, wait, never mind.

Okay it's now time for:

NFL  WEEK 10  WORST STATS

Worst team:  The Dolphins.   I mean, come on.  The 49ers come in a close second.  Colts 3rd.  Cowboys honorable mention.  Bengals amazingly bad.

ALL THE LOWEST  OFFENSE:
Points:  8  Colts
First Downs:  9  Cowboys  (10- 49ers)
Yards gained:  151  49ers
Rush yards:  2   Dolphins  (all-time franchise worst)
Passing:  46   49ers
QB Rating:   40.7  Pryor,  Raiders;   42.0  Kaepernick,  49ers  (Locker,  Titans 12.0 but left game)
INT:  4   Luck,  COLTS
Turnovers:  5   COLTS
Sacked:  6-45  49ers
Punts:  8   Ravens.   They punt a lot.  Edgar Allan Punt
Worst red zone:  0-4  Packers and Eagles both in the same game.   yowee.
Most Defensive TDS given up:  1  Colts,  Toxins,  Titans.  Titans decided the game.


WORST DEFENSE:

DALLAS COWBOYS

Points allowed:  49  Dallas (vs. Saints)
First downs allowed : 40  Dallas
Yards allowed:  625   Dallas
Biggest yardage differential:  -432  Dallas
TOP:  20:28   Dallas  almost gets under the magic 20:00
Passing Yards allowed :  388  St. Louis  (and they won!)
Rushing Yards allowed:  242  Dallas
Red Zone Conversion allowed:   3-3  Redskins;  4-5  Cowboys

PENALTIES:  Bengals  9-134   that's...really just way too much.

-wacko